About

I am the Sarlacc.

I am the most advanced form of life in the Universe. I was here before you were born, and I will be here long after you die (inside my stomach, hopefully). Streamlined and optimized, I live only to capture my prey and digest it – over the course of one thousand years. I am damn good at what I do, and I love it to boot.

My favourite foods are Jawas and Twi’leks.

I am endlessly entertained by the antics of the food I eat.

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